“I’ve got to lose the baby weight, I put on X number of pounds”, “I’m so fat”, “I couldn’t wear something like that with the weight I’ve put on”, “My body just isn’t what it used to be”, ” I HATE my body”.

Chances are you’ve heard these phrases or maybe you’re guilty of saying them. I get it. Disliking our bodies is kind of the “In” thing to do. We see it all day, every day. On TV, magazines, Facebook, Instagram, ITs all over the media, we’re surrounded by it. “How to lose 10 lbs. in 5 days”, “Slim those thigs with this quick workout”, “Abs you can grate cheese on in 5 minutes or less” (Okay, I made that last one up, but I think you get the picture) Ladies. Why the fuck are we doing this to ourselves, and more importantly why are we setting this example for our children?

Every single woman I meet has the ability to be everything she dreams of being. I’m guilty of the “I can’t”. I can’t lose weight, I can’t stop eating these bad foods (hello pizza & Wine, I’m looking at you.), I can’t commit to losing weight. Etc. I’ve yo-yoed my entire adult life. I love food. It literally makes my soul happy. Recently, I’ve had a lot of people ask me “What have you been doing? What are you not eating, tell me your secrets, you look amazing!” They stare at me in utter disbelief when I say ” I eat what I want and I’m more active and I go to a Bootcamp.” I’ve done the calorie counting thing, the weight watcher’s thing, meal plans, trainers, I’ve killed myself in the gym, I’ve starved myself because I wasn’t properly educated on how nutrition actually works. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. (Those didn’t work for me, but maybe they do for you & that’s what’s important. DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU. Minus the starving yourself because that isn’t okay.) Every single time I went through the motions a little voice in my head was constantly saying “You Can’t. You ate terribly, you didn’t work hard enough” I listened. Every single damn time, I listened and I’d give up. I’d beat myself up for being a failure. Truth is, we are much harder on ourselves than anyone else is.

Something shifted for me, I decided to accept myself and my body. I finally had the guts to tell that little voice “Yes, I CAN!!” I owe it to my husband, my little girl, blogging for MomTalk NB, fellow women on a path to bettering themselves and the fierce women I’m so lucky enough to call family and friends. I’m surrounded by incredibly successful people. I LOVE it. Sure, I have days where that little voice creeps back in, but I just silence that bitch, she’s got nothing nice to say and I don’t have time to listen. Try surrounding yourself with positive people, experiences and things. Seriously, that small change will make your life 100% easier and more enjoyable.

Okay, so you ate a cheat meal, or you missed a workout, or you fell off the wagon for the 5th time this week, girl, it’s okay! You’re still trying. Don’t give up. You’ve got a busy life, with an amazing family who is looking at you through rose colored glasses. Be the person your kids think you are. Wear the bathing suit, eat the cake and ENJOY that body of yours. It’s time to STOP being hard on yourself and time to embrace you in all of your wonderful glory.

I want you to do something for me. I want you to go look in the mirror and I want you to say one nice thing about yourself. You’re going to feel like a total fool, but humor me. Have a laugh. Smile at that gorgeous woman in the mirror. We need to build ourselves up. It doesn’t make you vain or conceited to love yourself. The first step to any real change is accepting ourselves for who we are, flaws and all. That’s when the magic happens. That’s when things start to change in our favor. A flower cannot grow with shade, without the proper food, environment and care. Why do we think we can thrive when we aren’t giving ourselves the love and care we give for others?

Selfcare isn’t selfish.

Who’s read the children’s book “Have you Filled a Bucket Today? – By Carol McCloud” If you haven’t I suggest picking it up, and if you have, are you a bucket filler?

Find yourself a fun community, whether it be online, a workout class once a week, a walking group or even the gym! Choose your goal and if you shift your focus, if you start loving yourself and start treating yourself with the respect that you deserve you will absolutely smash that goal. You’ll be a goal crushing fiend. There will be nothing that will get in your way. Whatever it may be, if you find your tribe you’ll find it easier and much more enjoyable. You’re amazing, give yourself the credit where credit has long been due.

Love, 

-A lady trying her hardest to be an example for her daughter. 

xo 

Like what you see? Check out more from Lucenda here!

Meet Lucenda

I’m Lucenda, or as my friends like to call me, Lue. I’m a mother to a strong willed, hilarious, and sweet little girl named Scarlett. I own/manage, alongside my wonderful husband (of nearly 5 years) Ryan, Rocky Road Auto LTD. You may have seen us advertised on this wonderful site.

I’m a sassy, country music-loving, karaoke singing, booty dancing kinda gal. I’m the friend you have fun with; you know the one who makes you have the extra glass of wine(or Jager bomb) or that piece of cake! I’m a strong believer that laughter is the best medicine.  I’ve been blessed with the most incredible family and friends a person could ever dream of (that’s not a cliché, I wholeheartedly believe it) My beliefs are simple: you get what you give, being positive will absolutely change your life for the better (especially in the bad times), kindness is contagious, and we could all stand to catch a bit more kindness. I tell it as it is, most times people appreciate it, other times it can get me into some pretty awkward situations. I watch too much TV, eat my fair share of delicious foods, love yoga, and drink too much wine. I’d love to say I’m a Pinterest mom, but I’d be full-on lying to you, unless you count Pinterest fails!  I love to strike up random conversations with just about anyone. So if you ever recognize me somewhere, stop and say hi! I feel like the world needs a little more random conversation, a lot more love, and way less negativity.

So that’s me, what you see is what you get.

Likes:  Wine. (White, Red, bottle, boxed or bagged. I’m not picky), Laughing until it hurts, Stock car Racing.

Dislikes: Rudeness, A variety of vegetables (I still eat them, but only the ones I like), Fakeness